Whew...It has been quite a while, hasn't it? I know, you're probably thinking I'm just being a lazy prick, and to be honest you wouldn't be so off the mark. However, it is not as if I didn't try. Its just that my line has been bugging the hell out of me recently and I often find that when I do get through, its usually when I have no mood to write anything. Unlike now, that is. I have been doing an awful lot of typing lately, mostly for college. I guess I might as well go where the momentum takes me. I've got time, so what the hell, might as well update my life...haha. Anyway, here goes. Life ahs been generally good recently. Its amazing how quickly life can change from being totally depressing to contented. I don't really feel contented, but honestly, I feel so much better about myself now than I ever did before. Yesterday, the 21st of March, is the most important day of every year for me and my beloved. It's her birthday, and also the day we found each other. We have been together for eight years now...EIGHT YEARS. I turn 20 this year. You do the math. There's honestly so much reason to be happy, yet there is still that little part inside me that is always discontent. Only I know what that is all about.
Life is good, for now. A major reason for this would have to be college. Surprising, isn't it? haha...It isn't as if my new college is anything special, but it happens to be a huge step up from what I have been going through all this while prior to my current course. For the first time, I feel I am where I want to be in an academic sense. The improvement is apparent in my work efficiency, which has never been better and also my general mood these days. Even my physical fitness has improved with my added activity. I feel good, and when I feel good, I push the boundaries that is myself. I have no idea what that means.

There was once a time when people use to tell me that I should always do what is right, that we should always fight for what we believe in, no matter how hard or difficult it is. That was a time when people cared about others more than hey cared about themselves, a time of honour, respect, trust, and sacrifice. It did not matter where we come from, how rich we were...the only thing that mattered is each other.
These days, sadly, people have changed. Nowadays it is no longer about doing what is right...its about doing whatever it takes to achieve success. Its not about fighting for what we believe in, but fighting for the scraps thrown around. Honour, respect, trust and sacrifice have all been replaced by ego, greed, distrust, and backstabbing, the four common feautures of modern society... the same modern society that we are so proud of.

Particles...have't heard that word in a while. I also haven't heard the words atoms, molecules, ions, bonding, chemical, thermo, electrostatic, stress and others for sometime now...and boy, am i glad! Glad to be away fromeverything science related...academically, at least. It sure feels good to be on the other side(though I never really thought of things that way).
Besides, the change does me good, I feel like a lot better nowadays, stronger, wiser, and there's an honest desire to work harder and enjoy my time. I'm moving into my peak years now, so I'd better shift into high gear soon. Hehehe...that's all fo now.

Today seems to be cursed. i'll be frank, this was a honestly terrible day, in terms of luck. You are probably thinking what a lazy punk i must be, since it takes so much for me to actually post something here. I know, I know...and I'm sorry, just been running kind of flat recently. Flat in terms of all the anarchistic, rebellious, and revolutionary ideas i usually bandy around. Well, three hours of traffic, missed classes, and a tow-truck scare has put me right back into the driving seat. I am PISSED. Or was, anyway.
Seriously, how in the name of all that is good and holy could anyone stand being stuck in a traffic jam for three friggin hours. it was so bad that at 8.30 am, I was able to look at my rearview mirror and still SEE the spot where my car was at 7.30a.m. ...absolutely ridiculous! I was fuming and blowing steam through every pore of my body at one point. It was all because of a three car accident on the highway.
I hate missing classes. For all my beef with the education system, I still get very upset when I'm late or absent. It irks the hell out of me because I like being reliable and punctual if nothing else. This kind of thing really affects my sense of discipline (yeah, yeah, I actually have one...quit sniggering like a buffoon).
Anyways, so much for the series of unfortunate events. Anything good happen recently? Yeah, I discovered that I happen to be the only one in my age group who actually has a true and honest direction in life, with minimum confusion and doubt. Strange to hear this about me, a guy who seemed destined to wallow in self-doubt and uncertainty, but it is true none-the-less. Ever since I started putting my foot down on what I truly wanted and desired in for myself, I kinda got this aloof sensibility that seems to set me apart from the rest of my 'peers'. I ain't confused no more, and damn it feels good!

Clearer my path is now, clearer too my sight. It feels freshs, the air that I breathe, fresh and new, as I walk this new road, the one less taken. It is true, then....it makes all the difference.
Lead me from hell, lift me into your heaven... I can see that the light shining down upon me now, and the storm will no longer cast a pall over my soul.
Will this calm last? Will it last forever, as I fade away into dreams? Or is it just another false alarm?
I guess I'll have to wait and see.